Q: Have you heard about corduroy pillows?
A: No? That surprises me because they're always making headlines.
Q: What did the farmer get when he stepped on his rake?
A: Two acres (achers).
Q: How many Surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: A fish.
Q: Why does it take ten blondes to screw in one light bulb?
A: Because they're so damned stoopid.
Q: Why is there a constant breeze blowing through Wrigley Field?
A: Because there's a fan in every seat.
Q: What did Moe say when Curly caught him making love to Larry?
A: I'm doing Fine.
Q: Why did Michael Jackson get fired as a spokesperson for Coca Cola?
A: He was caught feeling seven up.
Q: What is Howard Stern's favorite kind of jacket?
A: A windbreaker.